We talk a lot about growth like it’s accumulation.
More skills. More wisdom. More success.
But real growth?
It’s often about less.
Less gripping.
Less proving.
Less pretending that something still fits just because it used to.
After cancer, I started looking at my life differently.
Not just what I wanted to add—but what I needed to release.
What I’ve found is this:
Unlearning is one of the most powerful forms of self-respect.
The Habits I Let Go Of
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Overworking to feel worthy
I used to treat exhaustion like a badge. Now, I treat rest like a boundary. -
Always needing a project
Constant momentum isn’t the same as direction.
Some of the best ideas come when I stop trying to chase them. -
Saying yes to things I secretly resent
I used to fear disappointing people. Now, I fear betraying myself more.
The Beliefs I Let Go Of
-
“Strong” means silent
It doesn’t. True strength is visible. Messy. Vocal when needed.
I don’t hide my hard days anymore. That is strength. -
My body is only valuable if it’s attractive or useful
The mirror doesn’t define me.
My face has changed, and I’ve never felt more whole. -
I have to earn joy
I used to think pleasure came after progress.
Now, I know it’s part of healing. And part of being human.
The Goals I Let Go Of
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Chasing roles that looked good on paper
Titles don’t fulfill me. Impact does. Intention does. -
Trying to be “well-rounded” in everything
I’m not a Swiss Army knife—I’m a focused tool. I’d rather be precise than polished. -
Waiting until life was settled to really start living
Life is never settled. And I don’t want to wait anymore.
Why It Matters
Unlearning is uncomfortable.
It feels like stepping out of clothes that no longer fit—only to realize you’ve been wearing them for years.
But once you take them off, there’s relief.
Clarity.
Room to be the version of yourself that growth has called forward.
And that version?
She’s lighter.
Freer.
More intentional.
Because she knows she doesn’t have to carry it all to be enough.
